Dreamin On a Grey Afternoon

Dreams have always intrigued me, I suppose because when I do remember my dreams they are so damn vivid to the point where I can remember them years down the line.
Last night I had a dream that I was in one of the buildings on campus, when all of a sudden about a hundred cops were outside and I could hear my name come from their lips.  Apparently, they had accused me of murder because I happened to be in the same building around the same time as someone was murdered or perhaps committed suicide.  Instead of confronting them and admitting that I played no part in the death, I ran.  I don't know why, it is something that I would never do.  Family and friends were helping me hide, but only for short periods of time because, in dream world, the cops were all over the crime and in high pursuit of finding me.  Posters were up, pictures on the television.  News reports.  Finally, I found refuge in a cottage that my brother and sister in law had just recently moved out of, but had not sold.  This is when I woke up.
According to dream interpretation, the dream represents that I am failing in honoring my commitments and obligations.  It also implies that I'm being overwhelmed, shocked, and disappointed.  It also says that I may be getting a sense of rejection from people around me and that I harbor inspirational emotions.  It also talks about internal battles with myself and anxiety over the future.  It says that the cottage may represent an altered sense of reality and escaping responsibilities.
It's funny because I think that these dream interpreters look way too deep into dreams, but for once, the interpretation is pretty accurate.  My laziness has really peaked to an all time high and I want to change this so badly.

40 Day Dream by Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeroes

Longing to Leave

There is such a big big world and I don't get out of the town I'm in nearly as much as I should.  You probably don't either.  Be spontaneous and go somewhere.  Right now.  You only live once, why not?

New York - Cat Power

Just a Shitty Day

Some people call it checks and balances.  I call it life.  There are some days when I feel on top of the world.  There are other days when I feel like, well, shit.  Today is one of those shitty days.  It all started last night and continually got worse throughout the day.    BUT, it is days like this that makes days like tomorrow so much better, unless if that happens to be as shitty as today, which is possible.  I guess these are the days when I feel like everything that I've been working toward is pointless and getting me nowhere and how I should have worked harder and how I can never be as great as I want to be.  Instead of ranting about how my life sucks, well, I'll stop.  There is no easy solution to these problems. Too bad I am a poor bitch.  This is one of those days where if I had a reliable vehicle, I would drive for hours and hours, just to clear my mind.

It's days like this that I realize how grateful I am for my friends.

Corinne Bailey Rae - Put Your Records On

5 Reasons Why Women Are the Way We Are

I understand that men struggle with women, as far as our behaviors and emotions, but you know what?  There is a reason that we are the way that we are, which can sometimes be crazy.  But the truth is we're beautiful creatures that should be respected.  I've never been exactly a feminist, per say, but I feel that women are equally as crazy as men and we deserved to be treated that way especially in the world that we live in now.

So here's my 5 reasons why we are the way that we are
1.) Hormones... you trying having excess hormones and be normal, seriously.  There is at least a solid week where our hormones control our lives.  We realize that we are being crazy, but we can't help it.  Sorry, but not really.  You want to blame someone, blame genetics or God.
2.) We can hold a child.  Now, I know that this seems inadequate and rather... duh-ish.  BUT, this plays an important role in sex.  Some women just don't enjoy having sex because they are scared that they are going to get pregnant and although men have to deal with this too, to a certain extent, it ultimately boils down to what the woman chooses to do.
3.) Make-up.  I'm not too entirely sure why or where this shit was invented, but it took off like woah.  If we don't take thirty to forty minutes a day getting ready (and that's if we're quick), we risk looking like crack whores and hearing shit from all sorts of people.
4.) Hair prep.  This kind of goes along with the last one, but appearance is super important in our culture, for some odd reason, and the majority of us cannot just walk out of the door without doing something to our hair.  So, yes, we can get irritated with all this prep.
5.) Double-standards.  This mainly boils down to sex.  It is, in our society, completely okay if a guy sleeps with a lot of women, but if a woman sleeps with a lot of men, well, they are a slut or a whore.  Now, you try to be single and have somewhat of a sex life with that double standard, it doesn't work.

I'm not going to lie, there are pleasures in life that we get to indulge ourselves in.  For instance, chivalry.  There is no doubt that I love getting a meal paid for or movies or whatever and for that certain 'tradition', I do feel bad for men, but you know what?  There's just some things that should and will never change :) Deal with it.  But, know that we know that we're crazy, but the truth is boys, you couldn't live without us and you won't so get used to it and try to understand that our body works differently than yours.

I Am Woman - Helen Reddy

An Ode to Mr. Jimmy Jon Redcorn

When my heart broke into tiny little pieces, I never thought that it would be able to mend, but let me tell you what, it did.  I give full responsibility to Mr. Jimmy.  He is not the typical guy that I go for, that's for damn sure.  I'm not exactly country girl material and he is a country boy.  His whole family comes from a labor intensive family, whereas the majority of mine has sat at desks for most of their lives.  He works on cars.  I don't know shit about cars.  What I do know is that it took me five long months to fall in love with him, but when I did, I fell hard.  We're the corny couple that lays out on blankets during the middle of the summer and stargazes for hours.  We're the corny couple that read books out loud to each other.  We're the corny couple that jams out to Sinatra while road tripping.  We are both goofy motherfuckers and that, my friends, is where we find our middle ground.
My point is that sometimes things work out best if you think outside of the box.  Sometimes you have to break that normality that you are so used to because the best things in life are the things that are unexpected. 
Happy Valentine's Day everybody, I hope you find a love like that someday.

Frank Sinatra - The Way You Look Tonight

Getting Back in the Game

After heartbreak, where do you go?  I mean, you committed your full trust in someone, possibly lost touch or just plain lost some of your friends, and gave 110% love just to have your heart torn savagely apart.  The best way to get over a break up is reinvention, at least that's always the way that I deal with it.  Lose that extra weight you have been carrying around for however long.  Get your hair dyed.  Get that piercing or that tattoo.  Party your ass off and hook up with random people.  Above all, put faith in your friends and family because they are the ones that are still around and always will be. 
As far as new love, well, don't rush it.  There are many more fish in the sea (incredibly cliche, but true).  As difficult as it may be to comprehend, we are genetically engineered to have multiple partners and that soul mate stuff if bullshit.  We, as humans have the chemical possibilities to fall in love more than once.  The only advice that I can really give is to live and learn.  Learn from mistakes made in the past, wear a protective armor around your heart and the people that will treat you properly will chisel past that armor because they know that you are worth it.  Which you are. Just because one person is not compatible with you, doesn't mean that others aren't.  It simply means that they were too stupid to see what a great person you are.  Don't give up and don't listen to that lovey dovey heartbreak shit because all that does is trigger depression.

Three Little Birds - Bob Marley

Unrequited

Kate Nash - Nicest Thing

There is nothing worse than unrequited love and unfortunately, it happens ALL THE TIME.  Whether it be with a close friend, a distant friend, a co-worker, or just some random person that keeps popping into your life, either end of the stick gets screwed on the deal of unrequited love (at least those that don't play with others).
Unrequited love is pretty self explanatory, someone is into the person way more than the other person.  It is embarrassing if you swallow your pride to admit that you like someone, just to find out that they do not feel the same way about you.  On the other end of the spectrum, you could really enjoy spending time with someone that happens to be in love with you.  If you keep hanging out with them and acting the same, it is very unlikely that those feelings will just 'poof' disappear.  All in all, unrequited love is one of the hardest things that anyone and everyone will ever have to deal with and quite honestly, there's no easy solution to the problem.